White Flight in Fat City

Editor’s Note: This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. The opinions expressed do not represent those of this Blog or the editor. This piece started as a “What If?” exercise and matured from there. The editor takes no responsibility if individual readers or an entire class of readers cannot spot a flight of fancy when they see one….

From the Office of Bruno K. Harshman, Superintendent, Fat City Public Schools

To: Worried White Parent

Inre: White Flight

Recent news reports about white flight in Fat City’s public schools are grossly exaggerated, the product of an overzealous and biased beat reporter trying to stir things up and cause commotion.

While it is true that the ethnic make-up of our schools is roughly 70% Latino, this figure has not budged in the past three years, so there is no cause for immediate concern. While birthrates in the local Latino community continue to rise, at a rate some whites consider alarming, there is no indication that Latinos will soon overwhelm our white students.

Rest assured that if you place your precious white child in one of our schools, he/she will see other white faces and not be lost in a “sea of brown” as was reported in the press.

In the interest of candor I must admit that running the public schools in Fat City can be a dicey proposition that makes one think of early retirement. The yawning gap that divides the super wealthy from the merely rich, and the merely rich from the desperately poor, contributes to a wickedly complex socioeconomic brew. Naturally, whites who shell out a million dollars for a rundown tract house in a marginal neighborhood don’t want to confront the rude reality of a local elementary school stuffed to the gills with underachieving Latino students.

Generally speaking, white folks feel entitled to top-notch public services, even if they are unwilling to pay the taxes to pay for such services.

Trying to please every constituent group leads to sleepless nights, bleeding ulcers, and heavy consumption of booze and Rx drugs. (A 500mg Vicodin makes one almost impervious to even the most obnoxious parent.) If we focus time, effort and resources on little Chloe or Dylan at the expense of Juanita and Carlos, we are accused of blatant racism, and if we do the opposite and try to raise Juanita and Carlos’s test scores, white parents storm my office and accuse me of pandering to the “minorities.”

Frankly, I sometimes shake my head and wonder if the money I’m paid is worth the headaches. But…that’s another letter – or perhaps a book -- after I’m safely retired. Yes, after my pension is safe I’ll tell everything I know.

If I can again speak candidly…white folks like us are not accustomed or willing to accept minority status. There it is, I said it and I won’t take it back. Hang me from the highest rafter, see if I give a hoot! The demographic trend is against us and all our money and power can’t reverse it. All we can do, really, is build more gated communities and establish more charter schools, keep ourselves segregated from the masses.

My office door is open and I have a reliable supply of Vicodin. Please stop by and say hello!